Dear Big Girl

That's what we call you quite often - "big girl."

You are not big at all. Cute, pudgy, perfect. But, not really that big. Right on schedule, I'd say. And, as a female, I have no idea why I'd begin to call my precious daughter "big" - but I did, and now your brother calls you that, too. "Hey big girl, did you have a good nap?"

I also call you "sweetie peetie." "You're my sweetie peetie!" I tell you that at least once every day.

Elizabeth, you are six months old. I honestly do not know where the time has gone, and all I want to do is get it back. I want you to be a little round lump who curls up next to me as you nurse and sounds like a kitty when you cry. I want the skin to hang off our your little legs like it did the day we brought you home, and I want to worry about your platelet count, even though I don't need to anymore.

But no, you are rolling both ways; squealing with delight; cracking up when we use silly voices; almost sitting up; taking your pacifier out of your mouth and putting it back in; bouncing in your exersaucer and johnny jumper; nibbling on your toes; cooing; turned forward in the bjorn; grabbing utensils out of our hands; growing out of your clothes -- and I am crying because of it. I am so proud of you, but so sad because I'm learning, again, that this time is flying by, and I can't have it back. (And, I don't record nearly enough on the camcorder.)

Pure joy. That is what you are to all of us - Daddy, Daniel, me, all of your grandparents, aunts, and uncles. We all smile brighter because you are here with us.

I could never adequately explain the emotion I have for you and your brother other than to say that my life had no where near the meaning it has now that I share it with you. You make me more optimistic. You make me more thoughtful and more deliberate. I savor our moments together, even if it is 3 a.m. and you are hungry.

You have so much ahead of you in the upcoming weeks- food in just a couple of days, crawling, pulling up, jabbering, walking, and giving Daniel a run for his money. And, I'll be right there with you to help, and clap, and cheer... and cry.

conversations

My son is a conversationalist - he has been talking and answering questions very well for the past few months, but all of a sudden, in the last few weeks, I've noticed that he initiates the conversations with questions.

Today I told him I was hungry and going to have a snack, would he like one? His response, "Yes. I want kix and juice. What do you want for snack, Mommy?"

We were outside playing in his new gravel box (photos coming soon) and he said, "I'm digging a pond. What are you makin'?"

"Wook (Look), mommy, I have a daddy bear, a mommy bear, and a baby bear. That's me. They are a famiwy. (family)"

His memory continues to astound us. We went to the mall for a quick trip on Tuesday. He asked if we were going to go to the "monkey westawant (restaurant)." We met a friend in Baltimore a couple of weeks ago and ate at Rainforest Cafe there. That mall had skylights, too, so I think he thought we were back there.

We've taken him to a couple of Nationals games and he does NOT like the fireworks. He trembles, poor kid. The first time, I told him that fireworks scared me when I was a little girl, too. The other day, we were talking about going to the game, and he said, "I don't wike fireworks, mommy. They woud. (loud) You not wike fireworks when you wittle (little) gwiwl (girl) either."

He now says, "you're welcome" and can recognize several letters - B, D, F, X, Z, T - I credit the PBS show "Super Why" for that.

Daniel and Wizef (Elizabeth) do very well together. She thinks he is the most entertaining thing in the world and will laugh out loud when he does just about anything deliberate to get her attention. He said to me, "I wuv her so much." (love surge.) Melts my heart. And you know, she loves him, to. It's amazing this connection they can have - she knows Daniel, you can tell.

Elizabeth is our sweet girl. For someone who started out at a mere 5 lbs 11 oz, so small she made second time parents a nervous wreck changing her the first few times, she has really filled out - in a good way. She will be six months one week from today. I am happy and sad at the same time. I am savoring this time that she is an infant because I know i will not have it again. So, I'm proud of her achievements - rolling over, almost sitting up, grabbing everything - but sad that it is going by so fast. Even faster than with Daniel. Elizabeth plays with my hair and lights up whenever her Daddy walks in the door. I love that.

I love that we can plan our day according to the weather outside. Now that my hormones seem to have evened out for the first time in over a year, I think that I am doing a much better job dealing with the challenges of tantrums and lack of sleep. I truly cherish this time with my children and I would not give up my everyday with them for anything else in the world.